I have this habit of writing prayers in my journal and then forgetting I wrote them. God is taking me to task about this. I’ll share one recent example.
A few weeks ago, my morning Scripture reading was in 2 Corinthians. I read about how Jesus, who had been rich, became poor so that by His poverty, we might become rich (8:9).
As I meditated on Jesus, His humility and servant-heart, I saw how far short I fall from His example. So I confessed it. I wrote my prayer in my journal. I wrote how I do not like to be inconvenienced. I don’t necessarily enjoy putting myself aside for the sake of someone else. I asked God to change me, to give me a heart that is willing to give up so that others may gain.
And then I closed my journal and went to work. I didn’t give it a second thought.
The next day—yes, the very next day—I received an email from someone reaching out on behalf of her friend. What her friend needed was something I supposed I could do, but frankly, I didn’t want to do it. It felt like a kind of big ask. One I had no experience in. It was out of my comfort zone, and would stretch me more than I wished to be stretched. I wasn’t obligated to this person in any way—it was just a friend of a friend—so I dismissed the request.
I’m kind of slow sometimes.
Anyway, a few days went by. But that email—which I remind you, I was in no way obligated to—kept returning to mind. I was annoyed. Finally, while driving home from work one evening, I asked God about it.
“Why does that email keep nagging me, Father?” I asked, utterly clueless.
Well, remember the prayer you prayed the other day . . . ?” He began. I can only imagine how amused He must have been.
That was all He needed to say. Instantly, the whole thing came back to me. Embarrassed, I assured Him I remembered. As soon as I got home, I found my journal and re-read what I’d written. Oh my goodness, it was one of the clearest answers to prayer I’d experienced in a long time! I wanted God to make me willing to be inconvenienced and voila! Less than 24 hours later, He dropped an opportunity neatly in my lap.
“Okay, God, I get it. I’ll do it. You don’t have to say anything more.”
And so begins a new adventure for me. I don’t know how it all will work out. But I’m not worried. God answered my prayer. Obviously He has made plans about all this. His plans are always good, so I choose to trust Him.
But I will say this—if you ever ask God to change your heart about something, well, make sure you’re ready for the answer. Apparently that’s a kind of prayer that He loves to answer!